Feeling stuck in a rut is something that affects most of us at some point, and it’s far more common than you might think. When you’re in this headspace, motivating yourself to do even the simplest of tasks can feel impossible. Everything becomes a struggle – getting out of bed, going to work, spending time with mates, or doing the things you used to enjoy.
The good news is that ruts, while frustrating, are temporary. With the right approach and mindset, you can pull yourself out and start feeling energised about day-to-day life again. Understanding how to get out of a rut isn’t just about making big life changes – it’s often about small, manageable steps that gradually rebuild your motivation and sense of purpose.
This article is designed to help you recognise when you’re in a rut and give you actionable strategies to break free from it. For additional mental health support and to connect with professionals who understand what you’re going through, the LADZ app offers resources, communities, and a network of qualified professionals ready to help.
How To Get Out Of A Rut In 8 Steps
The first stage of getting out of a rut is identifying that you’re in one, which can be harder than it sounds. Many people normalise their feelings of being stuck, thinking it’s just a phase that will pass on its own. However, research shows this is a widespread issue – 59% of British people polled recognise that they’re in need of a change, while 61% feel that they’re “stuck in a rut.”
Understanding that you’re not alone in this experience can be reassuring. In this article, we’ll help you identify the signs of a rut and give you actionable tips and tricks to get out of one. Here’s what you can expect:
What Is A Rut?
The term “rut” dates back to the 19th century and originally referred to the deep grooves worn into roads by wheels. Over time, it evolved to describe feeling trapped or stuck in predictable behaviour patterns or mundane routines. When we talk about being in a rut, we’re describing a state where life feels repetitive, unfulfilling, and difficult to change.
Being in a rut typically feels like you’re operating on autopilot. You go through your daily routine without much thought or enthusiasm, and each day blends into the next. It’s different from temporary low moods or bad days – a rut is a prolonged period where you feel disconnected from your goals, passions, and sense of purpose.
Common symptoms associated with being in a rut include feeling emotionally numb, lacking motivation to try new things, experiencing a sense of boredom or restlessness, and feeling like you’re just surviving rather than thriving. Unlike depression, which can feel overwhelming, a rut often feels more like being stuck in neutral – you’re not necessarily sad, but you’re not happy or excited about life either.
Am I In A Rut?
It can be difficult to identify whether you’re genuinely in a rut or just going through a temporary rough patch. Here are some key signs to look out for:
Each Day Feels The Same
When you’re in a rut, your days tend to blur together without any sense of variety or excitement. You follow the same routine – wake up, work, eat, sleep, repeat – without feeling engaged or looking forward to anything specific. Weekends might feel just as monotonous as weekdays.
You’re Focused On Getting Through The Day, Not Enjoying It
Instead of finding moments of joy or satisfaction in your daily activities, you’re simply trying to make it to bedtime. You might find yourself constantly checking the time, counting down hours until you can go home, or feeling relieved when another day is over rather than satisfied with what you accomplished.
You Feel Unmotivated
Research has shown that motivation plays a crucial role in our mental wellbeing and life satisfaction. When you’re in a rut, even activities you used to enjoy can feel like chores. You might struggle to find the energy to pursue hobbies, maintain relationships, or work towards goals that once excited you.
You’re Bored
Chronic boredom is a telltale sign of being in a rut. This isn’t the occasional “I don’t know what to watch on Netflix” boredom – it’s a persistent feeling that nothing seems interesting or worth your time. You might find yourself scrolling through your phone mindlessly or watching TV without really paying attention.
You’re Scared Of Change
Paradoxically, while you might feel dissatisfied with your current situation, the thought of making changes feels overwhelming or frightening. You might recognise that you need to do something different but feel paralysed by the effort it would require or worried about making things worse.
Reasons You Might Feel Stuck In A Rut
Understanding why ruts happen can help you approach getting out of them more effectively. Humans have a natural tendency to make the same decisions repeatedly when faced with similar situations. Research has shown that our brains are wired to seek patterns and create habits as a way of conserving mental energy, but this can sometimes work against us when those patterns become limiting.
One of the main reasons people get stuck in ruts is fear of stepping out of their comfort zone. While comfort zones serve an important purpose – they provide security and predictability – staying within them for too long can lead to stagnation. The very thing that feels safe can become the thing that holds you back from growth and new experiences.
It’s important to remember that all ruts are different and can be caused by a wide range of factors. Your rut might stem from dissatisfaction with your job, feeling disconnected in your relationships, being stuck in the same environment for too long, or simply falling into routines that no longer serve you. Sometimes ruts develop gradually after major life changes, like starting a new job, moving to a new area, or going through a breakup.
External factors can also contribute to feeling stuck. Financial pressures, family obligations, or health issues can make it feel like you have limited options for change.
Getting Out Of A Rut In 8 Steps
These 8 steps offer a measured approach to pulling yourself out of a rut. They help break down what can feel like an overwhelming task into manageable pieces, making the process less daunting and more achievable.
1. Accept That You’re In A Rut
The first step is coming to terms with the fact that you’re in a rut and honestly assessing how it’s affecting different areas of your life. This isn’t about being harsh with yourself – it’s about honest recognition that leads to positive action. Consider how the rut is impacting your work, relationships, health, and personal growth. Denial will only prevent you from making helpful changes, so acknowledgement is essential for moving forward.
2. Find The Cause
Take time to figure out what lies at the heart of your rut. Ask yourself what currently brings you joy and what makes you unhappy. Are you doing things because you genuinely want to, or because you think you should? Ruts can often develop when we’ve been living according to other people’s expectations rather than our own values and desires. Look for patterns in when you feel most stuck versus when you feel most alive and engaged.
3. Understand Your Goals
Reflect on what truly motivates you and whether your current direction aligns with these deeper motivations. Are your goals realistic and achievable, or have you set yourself up for frustration? Sometimes, ruts develop when there’s a disconnect between what we think we want and what actually energises us. Consider both short-term and long-term goals, and make sure they reflect your interests rather than what you think you “should” want.
4. Start Small
Instead of trying to fix everything at once, try to focus on one or two smaller changes to begin with. This could be as simple as picking up a new hobby for 30 minutes a week or reaching out to a friend you haven’t spoken to in a while. Starting small makes the process of change more manageable and helps build momentum. It also allows you to figure out which commitments make you feel good and which don’t.
5. Take A Break
Your brain naturally works through problems by applying patterns from previous experiences, but sometimes, you need to reset this process. Taking a break – whether it’s a weekend away, a day off, or even just a different approach to your evening routine – can help you gain perspective and approach challenges with fresh eyes. This doesn’t have to be expensive or time-consuming; even small breaks from routine can be refreshing.
6. Trust Your Instincts
While impulsivity carries its risks, making some snap decisions can increase your confidence and add variety to your life. If you’re always overthinking every choice, you might be paralysing yourself into inaction. Sometimes, trusting your gut and saying “yes” to unexpected opportunities or making quick decisions about small things can help rebuild your sense of agency and spontaneity.
7. Avoid Perfectionism
It’s fine to have high standards, but perfectionism often leads to self-sabotage and feelings of anxiety and depression that can keep you stuck. Perfectionism can prevent you from trying new things because you’re worried about not being good at them immediately. Remember that growth comes from experimentation and practice, not from getting everything right the first time.
8. Get Support
Sometimes, what feels like a rut might actually be something more serious that requires professional support. Ruts share many symptoms with persistent depressive disorder, including fatigue, difficulty finding pleasure in life, and loss of motivation. If you can’t shake the feeling of being stuck despite trying various strategies, it’s important to reach out for help. The LADZ app connects you with mental health professionals who are ready to support you and help you work through these challenges.
Climbing Out Of A Rut
In her book “Reinventing You: Simple Steps To Transform Your Body, Mind, And Spirit,” author Dana Arcuri writes, “When we are stuck in a rut, we are being invited to grow and expand.” This perspective can be incredibly helpful when you’re feeling stuck. While ruts can feel disheartening and frustrating, they can also signal that you’re ready for positive change and growth.
Getting out of a rut isn’t just about returning to how things were before – it’s an opportunity to create something better. The process can help you gain clarity about what’s truly important to you, develop new skills and confidence, and build resilience for future challenges. Many people find that working through a rut leads them to discover new interests, strengthen relationships, or make positive life changes they might never have considered otherwise.
For further mental health support and to connect with professionals who understand the challenges of feeling stuck, the LADZ app offers comprehensive resources designed specifically for men’s mental wellbeing. Whether you need practical strategies, community support, or professional guidance, you don’t have to navigate these challenges alone. Download the LADZ app today and take the first step towards feeling energised and engaged with life again.
